Introduction

First of all, we want to thank you for expressing interest in our journey of adoption by reading this blog. I say journey because I feel it already has very much been a journey, albeit no pen has yet to make a mark on any paper. 

As I was perusing through the magazine stand at the grocery store my eyes were drawn to celebrity adoption. Katherine Heigl and Josh Kelly are adopting a second child; Queen Latifah is also to adopt her own. Charlize Theron, Shonda Rhimes, Ty Burrell, Sandra Bullock, Denise Richards and of course, the Jollie-Pitt family all have adopted, just to name a few. As glamorous adoption may seem, or as simple as it appears, I want this blog to uncover its ugly truth and unveil why less people are adopting as there ought to be. I want to deglamourize adoption and demystify the process, and I want you my friends to experience this roller coaster ride with us.

About the title: We believe that the child we get (boy or girl, infant or toddler, American or other) is very much a gift from god. Matthew means ‘gift from god’ hence the working title, “In search of Matthew.” No, we neither prefer a boy nor a girl and no, he/she would not be called Matthew/Maude. Unfortunately dear readers, you only get to see the whole thing from a female (my) perspective.

So here we go…


Why the adoption: The short answer is because we can't get pregnant. Before getting married, we knew we wanted a family. We didn't necessarily want a big family, but nor did we want to have just one child. Many of you are probably thinking we should be happy, at least we have Sam. Yes, we are very grateful for Sam. Having another child in our house is precisely because of our love for Sam. This isn't to say that having one child is wrong, it just isn't our conviction, not our resolve. We don't want to be over-bearing on him, as parents tend to get when there's only one to which their attention is focused. Further, we want Sam to be lifted of the burden a single child usually carry, sole and primary one to care for his parents. I don't mean the literal physical care for us, though it won't hurt if he does. A private homecare can do that. I mean one who has to worry about us when we are older. Take me for instance. As a child of 5, I have the freedom to travel and choose my residence anywhere in the world. I believe I only have this freedom becuase I know that I have 4 other sibings back home to check on our widowed mother. We can choose to relocate Sam to Ireland, should we want to move back, away from his grandmother knowing that she has other grandchildren close to her she can enjoy, you get my drift. Finally it also won't hurt that Sam can have a playmate, a friend, and an accomplice.


During the first few years of our marriage while trying to conceive, I came across this passage, Psalm 139. This passage has seen me through numerous fertility treatments, endless doubts and debelitating discouragements. This passage gave me something to hold on to until we met our Samuel, god's answer to prayers. This passage will continue to bring us through until we have our Matthew, with your help and prayers.